I strongly believe that I can answer this better because I have observed the transformation in myself. Self–esteem is a perfect weapon which can save your whole life ship from sinking.
First of all, let’s try to understand how can we recognize that our self-esteem is not up to the mark. Your friend suggests a change in your dressing style, which you would love to, but never try because you feel that you are unworthy.
You feel like going to a good restaurant for today’s dinner. But you stop from going not because you don’t have money, but because you feel that you are wasting money on you. This decision might alter if you have a company. But it alters, “only because you have a company”, which means you value the other person than yourself.
Not Clear? Have you ever spoke loud in a friend’s group just because you would like to? Did you ever take a risk willing to handle all by yourself? Have you ever objected when someone is blaming you, for getting stuck in traffic or for having a flat Tyre?
Accepting that you are unworthy or undeserving is the main symbol of low self-esteem. Some might accept it in the name of securing relationships, like me. Some might go on with it feeling that it is obvious, while for some it might feel like destiny as they wait for good days to come in their way.
Simple. Listen to your inner feelings. Whenever you have encountered all of these, you might be suffering inside, saying something like, “It’s okay. It happens” to yourself. But, it’s not okay. Not at all!! This might someday leave you in hell. Blames, failures, breakups, rejections etc. fill your life with darkness.
Instead, come out of it now itself. Start accepting challenges. Give yourself a small test and don’t let anyone know about it. If you fail, only you would know. If you pass, it will give you a smile. But don’t share this with anyone. Start doing like this for a few more days.
Every morning, while you are about to leave, look at you in the mirror and say, “You look great today. Have a great day.”
Go out and make new friends.
Try some new outfits without anyone’s help or suggestion.
Go to your favorite place/restaurant and refresh yourself
Go to spa/parlor and try something new.
Say a positive thing about you each day, aloud.
This will definitely bring a change in you. Now, take some decisions on your own, accept a challenge and declare to everyone that it’s your own responsibility. Though you succeed or fail, respect yourself for accepting the challenge boldly. Never let anyone blame you unnecessarily. This is the actual you.